I'm not a tree

Well it’s been a few weeks, it really has. I got busy. And stressed and lost my ability to cope at work it seemed. And I got sick. Twice.  First I had a bad cold which knocked me down and stole my voice.  I recovered. Then I got a stomach virus which knocked me down again. I wasn’t happy at work. I was stressed in the traffic and at home?   I loved being home but I had this big black cloud of UNI hanging over my head. I couldn’t relax. I knew that I should be doing uni every night after work, and on weekends. And I would feel so stressed and guilty when I didn’t.    I was spending a lot of time on uni and that didn’t leave much time for anything else, or anyone else. And it just wasn’t working. Something had to give.

So I stopped uni. I just stopped. I threw it out of my mind. I emailed the uni and said I’m out for a while. Maybe I’ll enrol in November. Maybe I won’t.   It just wasn’t worth it. In three years’ time, I’d rather have a strong happy relationship, than a degree. I’d rather have a job and have my emotional and mental sanity, than a degree.  I’d rather have close friends and family, than a degree.

And now?  I feel so much better.  I work all day knowing that when I get home, I can relax, I can breathe, I can enjoy my home and Mr Man. And the weekends are even better. We do stuff. We socialise. We work on our house, our future. I continue to breathe and relax and that means, come Monday? I’m ok. I’m ok for the week. And THAT is a beautiful thing.